Philippine cannabis culture: an expert’s guide to our local weed

by Tomi Uysingco

How well do you know our weed? (Augusto Paolo Dizon/ Pacifiqa)

Marijuana has been long smoked here in the Philippines that you seldom hear about people who haven’t tried it. During the mid-60s, according to my father, the hippies used to toke around Farmers’ Market when it first opened, walking around aimlessly without even being harassed. No one really cared at the time because the PDEA drug czars didn’t clamp down on the stoners yet; quite frankly, they didn’t know jack about it. But then again, sucks to be us now, since just a week ago I saw this PDEA officer on TV saying that three joints equate to twenty cigarettes. I don’t know if I should be bummed about that piece of misinformation or if I should just laugh at the idiocy of the statement. Either way, we have it bad right now in the Philippines in terms of the plant’s legalization. But hey, there’s hope, as lawmakers are actually considering its legalization for medical purposes.

Keep in mind though that once it is legal there’s a huge risk of pot losing its mystique, but that’s a different issue altogether.

Disclaimer: Marijuana is illegal in the Philippines. We’re not in Seattle or Colorado. I don’t encourage anyone to buy, and definitely not sell or grow marijuana — but if you do, you better be ready for the consequences when you get caught. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. On a future post, Pacifiqa will discuss the positive effects of Marijuana on medical conditions, the good it can do to our economy, to hopefully improve the collective awareness about this magical plant. But for now, let’s stick to the reviews.

That said, here’s a recollection and an unbiased review of all the pot I’ve smoked in different places around the Philippines.

 

 

Metro Manila

What people need to understand first is this: never buy a teabag. Most of the time it’s a waste of 50 to 100 pesos. It’ll only get you two salad joints that won’t even give a good high. I understand that some sources sell it by the gram or ounce like our western counterparts. Make sure that what you’ll be getting is kush, because if it’s not, you’re basically getting schwag. There have been reports of Kushberry and Skywalker Kush strains around the Metro, but ready your wallet though. The homegrown kush in Manila might be awesome, but it’s also pricey.

The Kushberry comes highly regarded, being a near perfect blend of the strains Blueberry and OG Kush. It’s a bit fruity and is known to mellow out without being heavy. Meanwhile, the Skywalker Kush, another OG Kush hybrid, is recommended after a stressful day at work and your primary goal is to kick back and relax: it would lay you out and some say could actually be an alternative to painkillers. Besides that, Skywalker Kush also sounds like a really cool rapper name.

I’m sticking with fiver baggies though. What’s a fiver? Its a sandwich bag, usually a Ziplock, that contains at least three decent-sized stalks. You could always get more, denominations can vary from one source to another.

The rise of the homegrown kush hasn’t reached its advent quite yet, so the pot in Manila is still mostly sourced outside of the city. Also, if you notice, once you hear your source has a new batch of weed you’ll also hear that people down south (assuming you’re from the greater part of Manila) would also, like magic, get theirs too. It’s pretty streamlined which is why we get the same stash with only slight variations to the product.

Baggies of the local pot sold by reliable people are some of the most potent stuff around. It’s mellow and you can still function properly — very chill and sociable. Like most, everyone is prone to getting far out, especially with weed that gets people talking, so get ready for deep discussions about space and time and life. “But what if your life is just a dream of a dying man on his death bed and when he wakes up, that’s real life?” I know you’ve had this discussion before.

 

Edibles

Before, pot-spiked brownies, often called “space cakes” were the top choice for consuming THC. Now, we have variations such as hash candy, marijuana oil, hash oil, and even flavored pastries that will leave the consumer “satisfied” by all means. Be sure you know this before taking one though: it’s known that consuming spiked edibles usually leads to stronger highs than smoking. These edibles are commonly used to treat illnesses, since smoking can be harsh for some.

 

Cebu

I’ve stayed in Mactan, Cebu for a year and a half to study film. During my stay with my wife, we came to know and become good friends with a lot of people in the reggae scene. Cebu boasts to be the reggae capital of the Philippines, which is quite entirely true. And we all know what these reggae dudes love doing besides listening to Bob Marley. Yes you guessed it, smoke ganja and pass the dutchie from the left hand side. (That’s a joke btw, they listen to other stuff too.)

Pot in Cebu is wonderful, it’s always sticky and always fresh. It also comes in larger quantities too, compared to the stuff in Manila. The weed in Cebu usually comes in stalks with the buds still attached. Sometimes you even need to hang dry it yourself, that’s how fresh it is. The high is perfect to chill and hangout to, but at the same time you can still finish what you were supposed to do. Even when baked on this stuff, one can get to be functional with the matching tendency of feeling highly creative. (I just giggled after typing “highly creative.”)

There are bad batches though, where you’ll find yourself too stoned to move and even feed yourself. The high is too heavy and heady that you could find yourself slowly passing out right after smoking, due to its Indica composition.

Sagada

Once you have decided to brave the long bus commute through treacherous, winding zigzag roads, you’ll realize that the excruciating trip to the majestic mountains of the north is all worth it. Not just because of the magnificent view and the cold, crisp mountain air, but also because everyone knows the best weed comes from Sagada.

Since Sagada’s climate is perfect for growing weed outdoors, you’ll find locally grown Lemon Kush, African Durban, oodles of hash bigger than chocolate bars, and crumbly pollen everywhere — that is if you know who to ask.

The Lemon Kush has a light green hue and smells like zest, a bit dusty, and unsurprisingly has a citrus taste. It’s heady, potent and smooth. The African Durban, on the other hand, smelled of flowers and was more brown in color with sticky crystals surrounding the buds. Tasted of flowers too, so it’s like smoking a flower that gets you high.

The hash game in Sagada is just all over the place. Hash is a compressed combination of concentrated THC and other cannabinoids, prepared in an intricate manner. It looks like chocolate and the high is as tasty as it looks. Apparently, almost everyone in Sagada is trying to sell hash. One guy took my dad and me to this local joint that sells cold beer. There, we were offered weed by locals and told us stories that could have lasted for days. One guy even asked me to roll a joint made out of pure pollen. Pollen is a pressed block of kief that gives a heady, pleasantly electrifying buzz.

 

El Nido, Palawan

The weed in El Nido is not as good as the ones mentioned above. It’s of the nicest places on Earth but they have crap weed. I’ve been thinking of a way to at least sugarcoat this, but I can’t. And the cherry on top is that the stash you get doesn’t even look appealing. The buds are thin and not at all sticky.

Don’t get me wrong, it does get you high but your patience needs to be stretched a bit, as well as your lungs. The come down comes so quick from a full pipe, the most is around 15 minutes max, that you have to keep on toking to achieve that good high going. There are rumors going around that you could barter goods with the farmers up in the mountains, far away from the beach and tourist areas. The quality would still be questionable, some say that it’s better, but it’s just going to be extra work on your part. You’ll have one of the most beautiful beaches in the world in front of you, and you’ll be hauling up a sketchy mountain for some weed that might or might not be better.

 

Zamboanga

And here you thought El Nido was bad; it gets even worse.

Billed as “the worst weed in all regions,” it must be sad being a stoner in Zamboanga. When you need, at the very least, three joints to get your buzz going. Its appearance doesn’t help its case at all too. Due to, I assume, the poor plant cutting and grooming, the weed is a flat dark green mess filled with seeds. There are so many seeds in fact that you could make your own plantation. I’m exaggerating, of course. But still, it’s illegal, and more importantly, don’t perpetuate bad pot.

What’s more: the quantity matches its quality. You’ll be paying a lot more for what you could get in Manila for a lot less. A thousand’s worth would get you two thirds of a baggie here, and it’s only heavy because of uncountable seeds. Doesn’t that just make you weep a little on the inside?