News: Largest penis belong to Congo! Smallest North Korea! This is according to BOI report(Board Of Inches) not of Magalong but MEGALONG !
— Joey de Leon (@AngPoetNyo) March 15, 2015
Entertainment
12 Filipino Twitter accounts to make you laugh
Aside from being a source of news, celebrity gossip, and updates from your friends’ mundane lives, Twitter is a great source of comic relief. Only the funniest people can make you crack up with a single tweet. Filled with jokes, puns, and offhanded humor, what follows is a list of funny Twitter accounts you should follow right now.
Joey de Leon
The king of wordplay (his handle is “AngPoetNyo”) Joey de Leon mostly tweets about social and political issues, always giving his punny take on the matter.
Hinuhulaang tatagal din ang One Direction tulad ng Beatles until they are 64 years old! But they will change their name to One Erection !
— Joey de Leon (@AngPoetNyo) March 21, 2015
Brod Pete
(But mostly funny RTs)
Alien! Brod Pete brings his Ang Dating Daan humor to Twitter. Too bad his feed is mostly composed of retweets from news websites. More of his funny stuff can be found on his verified Facebook page.
excited ako mamaya sa concert ni ed sharon…
— Brod Pete (@iBrodPete) March 12, 2015
May kapalit na si Zayne Malik… pic.twitter.com/JbcEggz9eA
— Brod Pete (@iBrodPete) March 26, 2015
PNP
No, this isn’t a parody account—and that makes @PNPhotline even funnier. We salute you, sirs.
Paalala ni Tsip Hindi lang para sa isa Ito ay para sa lahat Na tayo ay mag-ingat Di lang sya nagmamahal sa yo Kaya ako nandito Lab ko kayo
— PNP Tweets (@PNPhotline) March 19, 2015
Mahal ka na nya Sabi mo naman sya na! Pero di pa kayo nagkikita Dahil sa text mo lang nakilala Doble ingat lang Pag nagyaya syang magkita
— PNP Tweets (@PNPhotline) March 14, 2015
Coños of Manila
Most of the “Of Manila” accounts have gone into obscurity now and only the wittiest have survived.
Overheard this today: "What the hell is galunggong? Is that a vegetable?"
— Coños of Manila (@ManilaConyos) March 16, 2015
Payag ka sobrang hot ng girlfriend mo pero she says "stuffs"?
— Coños of Manila (@ManilaConyos) March 26, 2015
Mejo mali boat shoes mo bruh pic.twitter.com/MqOiOwxjtc
— Coños of Manila (@ManilaConyos) March 25, 2015
Titas of Manila
*motions you to come to her* Sabihin mo nga sa 'kin ang totoo. Hindi ko sasabihin sa mommy mo. Atin-atin lang. Are you a gay?
— Titas of Manila (@TitasofManila) February 24, 2015
*random butt flashes on HBO* Ay, may bold! Belinda close your eyes
— Titas of Manila (@TitasofManila) January 28, 2015
Dads of Manila
Nak, when you're cleaning your gun, make sure it's not loaded.
— Dads of Manila (@DadsOfManila) March 3, 2015
*makes fun of Pacquiao's kids names *has siblings named Girlie, Boyet and Baby
— Dads of Manila (@DadsOfManila) November 27, 2014
Gabe Mercado
Comedian Gabe Mercado of Okay ka ba tiyan? fame also sings vocals for Da Pulis and has played small roles in TV and film. He has also been active in advocating adoption for couples and single parents.
This was sent to me. pic.twitter.com/2JlfXbSeWM
— Gabe Mercado (@gabemercado) March 18, 2015
Ang Ateneo Senior High School may tsiks na. Ako, wala pa rin.
— Gabe Mercado (@gabemercado) March 13, 2015
Annabelle Rama
The famous matriarch of the prominent Gutierrez clan is also on Twitter! True to her tita-ness, she mostly plugs her Instagram account whenever she posts something new. Tita Annabelle, you can actually link your IG to your Twitter account.
Viva Pit Señor I just posted ng picture ng cute apo ko na si Baby Zion kasama ang Lolo Eddie nya check nyo sa Instagram annabelleramaig
— Annabelle Rama (@annabellerama2) January 18, 2015
To all my followers if type nyo makita new look nyo follow nyo ako sa Instagram annabelleramaig thanks
— Annabelle Rama (@annabellerama2) January 13, 2015
Ramon Bautista
Self-proclaimed internet action star Ramon Bautista’s tweets are sure to brighten up your feed.
Mags-speech din sana ko nung graduation pero pinigilan ako ng mga teacher..dahil hindi talaga nagsispeech mga "sakto lang" students hihi
— Ramon Bautista (@ramonbautista) March 23, 2015
Ferris wheel ka ba? Kasi pinapaikot mo lang ako..pero sakay pa rin ako nang sakay hihi<3
— Ramon Bautista (@ramonbautista) March 10, 2015
Superstarmarian
Superstarmarian is one of the first celebrity parody accounts and she’s still going strong. #Meynteyn
Short story: "mars ganda ng venue ng weding mo! Pano mo nabook yan?" "BALE SINulot ko". the end. ahaha dyoks lng. Last na yan ahaha
— Marian Rivera-Dantes (@superstarmarian) February 23, 2015
I do, I dong, #PakandongDingdong <3 @iamdongdantes
— Marian Rivera-Dantes (@superstarmarian) December 30, 2014
Congratch 2 all d new lowyers! Hinahamon ko kayo na isulong ang katarungan at ipaglaban ang karapatan ng mamamayan na magpiktyur ng clouds.
— Marian Rivera-Dantes (@superstarmarian) March 26, 2015
So, What’s News?
The satire news website-slash-blog mixes current events and political commentary with humor and sarcasm.
O, may Bronze ticket daw si Melissa Mendez para sa 1Direction concert mamaya. Puwede daw ba sya umupo sa Diamond section?
— So, What's News? (@SoWhatsNews) March 21, 2015
Congratulations po! We're so happy for your family! RT @SenatorBinay: pic.twitter.com/rFUmM2Bl4d
— So, What's News? (@SoWhatsNews) March 17, 2015
Professional Heckler
The multi-awarded blogger also does a lot of commentary on politics, society, showbiz, and sports. Although his blog says that he “heckles,” his take on the current issues are still worth retweeting.
According to Pulse Asia, President Aquino's approval and trust ratings have fallen. ER Ejercito is making a movie about it.
— Professional Heckler (@HecklerForever) March 23, 2015
Napeñas: We have the same favorite song. PNoy: Really? What? *sings* "Ako ang nakikita, ako ang nasisisi, ako ang laging may kasalanan."
— Professional Heckler (@HecklerForever) March 11, 2015
